I wanna passion pit in your ass
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize