'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
