Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
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