I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
