Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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