Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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