I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
