she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
