She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
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