In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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