Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
