she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
