Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
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