Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
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