Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Randomize
