guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
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