Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Randomize