the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
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