If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize