Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
