mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
