I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
