Don't you send me to vm
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Banned from zoo.
Again?
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
