I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
