its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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