Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
