Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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