The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Damn victory sex feels great
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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