People with herpes should wear stickers.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize