she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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