Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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