I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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