You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
bring money and cleavage
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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