maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize