Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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