In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
