time to smoke my breakfast
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Randomize
