my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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