Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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