How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
