Non-Jews are for practice
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize