It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize