would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Randomize
