I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize