i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Come see our sink grown plant.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
