sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
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