Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
