Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
it's great music for shaving your balls
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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