Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
