And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
